A Woman Tried to Smuggle an Unopened Bottle of Wine Into Jail . . . in Her Hoo-Ha
A Woman Tried to Smuggle an Unopened Bottle of Wine Into Jail . . . in Her Hoo-Ha
What you go there, Cupcake? Cupcake Pinot Grigio?
A 48-year-old woman named Monique Megchiani was arrested last month for trespassing at a CVS in Michigan.
The cops cuffed her, patted her down for weapons, and told her to get into the squad car . . . but she paused. She said she couldn’t get inside.
The cops said she didn’t have a choice . . . and so, she slowly and awkwardly maneuvered her way into the backseat. The cops noted her struggling to move, so they had her checked out by a corrections officer at the jail.
Turns out Monique’s limited range of motion was because she had a full BOTTLE OF WINE inside her . . . uh, HOO-HA. Not one of those mini-bottles, a 12-inch, two-and-a-half pound, typical bottle.
If you want a more accurate visual . . . (bless you) . . . the officers say she’d “concealed a bottle of Cupcake Vineyards Pinot Grigio inside her person.”
The cops say she’d swiped it from the CVS, and it did have a screw-top, so she wouldn’t have needed a wine-opener to get into it . . . if her plan wasn’t foiled.
On Wednesday, she pleaded guilty to a felony contraband count that carries a maximum five-year prison sentence. In return, prosecutors have agreed to drop several other charges. She will be sentenced in August.
(Here’s her mugshot.)
